Do you recognize your longing for God?
Longing expresses a deep desire that isn’t like the itch to go buy something or have a snack. It is a desire for happiness in a relationship.
Sometimes longing is misdirected to shopping sprees or ice cream tubs, but these can’t satisfy the deep desires of the human heart for friendship, understanding, and love. You long for a spouse who is absent, or a child who is away from home for the first time, or for a friend that you can speak to in complete honesty. It is the desire of the human heart to know and love and be known and loved. You can be surrounded by people, but if these desires are not fulfilled then you still feel lonely in a crowd.
The deepest longing of the human heart is for God, because in the end there is no one who knows and loves you like the One who made you. Having a spouse or friend who makes you feel understood, appreciated, and accepted is only a faint intimation of what we experience in communion with God.
In Psalm 63, we hear about the soul’s longing for God, like a parched desert land without water in the experience of separation from God and satisfied like a rich banquet with God’s presence. These images capture the daily experiences of consolation and desolation – the feeling of presence and absence from God in which faith, hope, and charity may seem to be either fed or starved. There are times when charity and its fruits of patience, generosity, peace, and self-control seem to flow effortlessly compared to other times.
The experience of consolation and desolation is something of a mystery. At times there is a natural cause: the death of a loved one, betrayal by a friend, or the frustrations of daily life are natural causes that can easily become experiences of spiritual desolation, just as the joy of a birth, celebration of success, or heartfelt complements can give rise to spiritual consolation. But there are times when they are allowed by God and there is no discernible cause for the experience of feeling that God is close or distant. These are reminders that our relationship with God can’t be reduced to superstitious manipulation; God’s existence goes far beyond what we can understand and he does as he wills for reasons unknown to us, but we can always trust his plan of infinite goodness and his call to share his happiness, even when growth through spiritual desolation is necessary for us to continue towards him.
The Parable of the Wise and Foolish Virgins is a reminder that our choices make a difference. No matter what our experience of consolation or desolation may be, we choose whether or not to trust God and what he has told us. There are things always within our control, and foremost is the choice to obey God or not. I may feel that God is near or far, but judgment is based on what I do in either situation. Whether God feels close or distant, I can recognize that I have a longing that only God can fulfill and that I make choices that will take me closer or further from that fulfillment.
~Fr. Nate
